Routines can be good things, but getting them to become routine is the tricky bit. And fitting everything extra (cooking, planning, friends, activities) into this fresh Fall routine?  Hoo boy. It makes me feel a little [...]]]> Wake. Breakfast. School. Work.  Snack. School. Work. Lunch. School. Work. Snack. Work. Chores. Play. Dinner. Play. Bed. Repeat 4 times.  Weekend.

Routines can be good things, but getting them to become routine is the tricky bit. And fitting everything extra (cooking, planning, friends, activities) into this fresh Fall routine?  Hoo boy. It makes me feel a little panicky.

Feeling panicky fires up my organizational thinking.  Give me boxes.  Give me label guns.  Give me a freezer full of quick meals.  Watch me go people!

Stocking your freezer with items that can form the base of a fast homemade meal is a sanity saver.  And please.  Pretty please, don’t suggest once-a-month cooking to me.  I’ve tried it.  I failed. Miserably.  I am a fickle girl and while I approach it with enthusiasm, I fall down on it for the same reason that I can’t shop for a month at a time.  My solution is to make rubber chicken meal starters; big batches of food that form the base of many quick meals.

I’ve got a kids-of-all-ages pleasing, time-saving, budget-friendly, brain-soothing rubber chicken meal that all starts with a lip-smacking Barbecue Bacon Cheeseburger Meal Starter. Once you have this meal starter under your belt you can stir it into macaroni and cheese, top a pita-bread or pizza dough with it and pile on some grated cheese before baking it then tossing on chopped tomatoes and onions for a quick cheeseburger pizza, scoop it up with tortilla chips for some barbecue bacon cheeseburger nachos for game day*.) But today?  Today is all about the Barbecue Bacon Cheeseburger Stuffed Sandwiches.

Oh yes, my dears.  I am about to make you very popular.  Barbecue Bacon Cheeseburger Stuffed Sandwiches do everything but your windows.  They make a fantastic brown-bag lunch (if you have access to a way to heat it at lunch time), great dinner-on-the-go, incomparable hand-held tailgating (or sports watching) snack food, and they’re freezer friendly to boot.  By removing the sandwiches from the oven a few minutes early and wrapping with foil before freezing, you have the foundation for a meal that is done in thirty minutes or less on hand.  I tell you that if you serve these with a big pile of Cowboy Candy you will be a certifiable super star.  Gimme a high-five!*

*I have a decidedly geeky habit of high-fiving.  My kids and high-school senior sister have tried to cool-ify my high-fives by adding a fist-bump and some slide-y action afterward and telling me not to yell, ‘HIGH FIVE!’ with it but I fear they’ve only succeeded in pointing out that no matter what I do, I will never, ever be cool again. My food, however, is crazy cool. Because all my cool is poured into my food there is none left for me.  It’s a price I’m willing to pay.

So let’s recap.  Cook this big batch of meal starter (you already won because it has BACON in it!).  Divide it up into smaller portions and freeze or refrigerate those portions.  Use one portion to make Barbecue Bacon Cheeseburger Stuffed Sandwiches (a meal-starter in and of themselves because they freeze like a dream.  A dream I tell you!).  Are you excited yet?  I am.  Let’s get cooking…

HIGH FIVE!

For a photo-free, printer-friendly version of this recipe click here!

(The printer-friendly version of the recipe contains instructions on preparing the bread dough by hand or by stand-mixer.)

To Make Barbecue Bacon Cheeseburger Stuffed Sandwiches

Ingredients:

• 3 cups Barbecue Bacon Cheeseburger Meal Starter (see recipe below)
• 1 batch of Buttermilk Sandwich Bread dough or 2 pounds thawed frozen or other bread dough of your choice. (See recipe for bread dough below.)
• 1 egg beaten with 1 Tablespoon water (for egg wash.)

Optional:

• Sesame seeds, poppy seeds or minced onion for topping

Preheat oven to 400°F.  Line a large baking sheet with a piece of parchment paper.  Set aside.

On a lightly floured surface, divide the bread dough into 12 even pieces.  Roll each piece into a ball.  Working with one piece of dough at a time, flatten bread dough into a circle that is about 1/4″ thick.  Place about 1/4 cup of the meat filling into the center of the dough circle.  Gather up the edges of the dough around the filling and cinch to seal.  Place seam side down on the parchment lined pan.  Repeat until all the dough is used.

Gently cover the dough with a piece of lightly oiled plastic wrap or a damp tea towel.  Let rise in a warm place for 15 minutes or until slightly puffy.  Brush with the egg wash and sprinkle with any desired toppings.

Slide the pan into the preheated oven on the center rack.  Bake for 18-24 minutes, rotating the pan 180 degrees halfway through the cooking time, or until the rolls are deep brown and shiny and the bread is cooked all the way through. Remove the pan from the oven and let the rolls rest on the pan for 5 minutes before transferring to a cooling rack.  Let the rolls rest at least 15 minutes before eating.

If you wish to freeze the rolls remove them from the oven about 5 minutes early and let cool completely on the pan before putting the pan directly into the freezer.  When the rolls are frozen through (about 6 hours), wrap each one in foil and transfer to a resealable freezer bag.  Kept like this in the freezer they will be good for about 3 months.  To reheat, place foil wrapped rolls on a pan and heat in a preheated 400°F oven for 15 minutes.  After 15 minutes, open the foil so the rolls are exposed and continue heating until hot all the way through.

Big Batch Barbecue Bacon Cheeseburger Meal Starter

Yield: 5 meals worth of starter

Ingredients:

• 5 pounds 90% lean ground beef
• 1 pound sliced smoked bacon, cut into 1/2″ strips
• 2 cups ketchup
• 1/2 cup packed light brown sugar
• 1/2 cup cider vinegar
• 2 Tablespoons prepared yellow mustard
• 3-5 cloves of garlic, peeled and minced
• 1 teaspoon Kosher salt
• 1/4-1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
• 4 cups shredded Cheddar or Monterey Jack cheese
• freshly ground black pepper, to taste

Optional:

• 1 small onion, peeled and finely chopped

In a very large skillet (or a stove-top safe roasting pan over two burners) cook the bacon strips over medium heat, stirring frequently, until deeply colored and crispy. Use a slotted spoon to transfer the crisp bacon to a paper towel lined plate.  Cover the plate with foil and set aside.  Drain most of the fat from the pan, leaving about 1 Tablespoon, and return the pan to medium heat.

(If using the optional onions, add them to the pan now.)

Break up the ground beef into the pan.  Cook the beef, stirring and breaking up large clumps of the beef, until the beef is browned and no longer pink in the center.  If necessary (if there is a lot of liquid or fat remaining after browning the beef), drain the beef in a colander, wipe the additional fat from the pan, and return the drained beef to the pan.

Lower the heat on the pan to medium low and add the ketchup, sugar, cider vinegar, mustard, garlic, salt and red pepper flakes to the beef mixture.  Stir to evenly coat and cook until the sauce coats all the beef and is hot.  Add the reserved bacon and shredded cheese and stir until the cheese is completely melted and the bacon is evenly distributed.  Taste and add black pepper to your liking.

Divide the beef mixture into heat-safe containers with tight fitting lids.  I usually divide the starter into 3 cup portions. Cool quickly (by resting in a bowl with ice water halfway up the sides of the containers.)  The beef mixture will be good in the refrigerator for four days or in the freezer for up to four months.

Buttermilk Sandwich Bread

Ingredients:

• 1-1/2 cups Cultured Buttermilk (You’re making your own, right?)
• 2 Tablespoons softened butter
• 4 cups bread flour (1 pound and 1 ounce by weight.)
• 2 Tablespoons sugar
• 1 Tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon vital wheat gluten (If you can’t find this it can be omitted, but it helps the structure and texture of the finished bread.)
• 2 teaspoons salt
• 2-1/2 teaspoons instant yeast or SAF yeast

Optional:

• 1 egg beaten with 1 Tablespoon tepid water to glaze the bread

Bread Machine Instructions:

Load all ingredients into the pan according to your bread machine manufacturer’s instructions.  Program for a simple white cycle and press START.

Immediately remove bread from the pan to a cooling rack when the cycle is finished.  Cool completely before slicing.

(For instructions on preparing bread dough by hand or with a stand-mixer see the printer friendly version!)

What is is about corn dogs that is so appealing?  Is it as simple as the whole “food on a stick” universal truth*? Or is it more complicated?  Maybe it comes down to the crazy appeal of the hot dog itself.  Perhaps it’s the [...]]]> Summer and corn dogs are like winter and hot cider; you just hafta.

What is is about corn dogs that is so appealing?  Is it as simple as the whole “food on a stick” universal truth*? Or is it more complicated?  Maybe it comes down to the crazy appeal of the hot dog itself.  Perhaps it’s the hint of honey in the crispy-exterior, moist-interior cornbread.  Could it be the cultural association of fairs and festivals and carnivals and summer fun in sultry heat? The vinegar bite of yellow mustard dripping down the corn dog?  I don’t know.  All I know is that when you say ‘corn dog’ I make like Pavlov’s loyal companions and drool.

Alas, having chosen to live in the middle of nowhere as I have done, I don’t often stumble across carnivals and their vittles.  And I won’t settle for satisfying my corn dog cravings with an uninteresting box of frozen mystery hot dogs covered in cloyingly sweet cornbread batter*. The only solution is to take matters into my own hands.

*I know that fairs and carnivals probably aren’t serving up Zweigle’s or Nathan’s or Hebrew Nationals in their corn dogs, but somehow the ambiance of a fair makes up for it. I just don’t have the carnival barkers, brightly colored tents or enough tattoos to compensate at home.

Corn Dog Bread is the quickest, easiest, tastiest way to fill that corn dog shaped void in my psyche.  Of course, being unable to restrain myself, I added a few flourishes to the corn dog bread that bring it more into my wheelhouse; stoneground cornmeal, candied jalapenos and chopped onions.  But friends?  If you want the real deal, the most honest representation of corn dogs without a stick that you can possibly get, just go au naturel; use good old yellow cornmeal from the round canister and ix-nay the jalapenos and onions.  I won’t be hurt.

It goes without saying (but I’ll say it anyway) that this is the ultimate in kid-of-all-age-friendly food.  Cut up into squares, it’s easily tucked into a bag to take with you to baseball practice, on a picnic, at the drive-in theater or just out on the front porch enjoying that sweet summer breeze.  And this is easily turned into a vegetarian-friendly entrée by swapping out the hot dogs for veggie dogs.  Please ‘em all, I say!

Whichever way you make it, spicy or plain, serve with a plate piled with barbecue beans and coleslaw for the ultimate summer meal.

For a photo-free, printer-friendly version of this recipe, click here!

Corn Dog Bread

Ingredients:

• 1 cup (4.25 ounces by weight)  all purpose flour
• 3 cups stoneground cornmeal (15 ounces by weight) (You can use regular yellow cornmeal, but be sure not to use self-rising cornmeal here!)
• 1-1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 4 teaspoons baking powder
• 3 Tablespoons honey
• 2 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cayenne pepper
• 1/4 teaspoon granulated garlic (garlic powder)
• 1/4 teaspoon granulated onion (onion powder)
• 4 eggs, beaten
• 6 Tablespoons melted butter
• 2-1/2 cups buttermilk (Don’t forget how easy it is to make your own real buttermilk!)
• 8 hot dogs, sliced into 1/4-inch rounds (You can use leftover grilled hot dogs or fresh hot dogs; either is fine!)

Optional, but tasty:

• 1/2 a cooking onion, peeled and chopped finely
• 2 Tablespoons Candied Jalapeno or pickled jalapeno rings ~or~ 1 fresh jalapeno, sliced into 1/8-inch rounds

Preheat oven to 375°F. Lightly grease a 9-inch by 13-inch baking dish and set aside.

In a large mixing bowl, combine flour, cornmeal, soda, powder, salt and sugar with a whisk.  In a medium sized bowl or large liquid measuring cup, whisk together the eggs, melted butter and buttermilk.  Pour the liquid mixture into the dry mixture and stir lightly until the batter has mostly come together but still has some small lumps (Grandma’s notes specify to use a whisk.  I do what Grandma says.  It’s always for the best.)

Fold the sliced hot dogs and onions (if using) into the batter gently just until combined.  Scrape the batter into the greased baking dish and level the top.  If using the jalapeno rings, arrange evenly over the top of the batter.  Slide the baking dish into the oven and bake for 30 minutes, or until the top is golden brown and it tests done*.

*A toothpick or cake tester stuck into the center of the bread will come out clean.

Slice into squares and serve warm or room temperature with the usual corn dog accompaniments -mustard, ketchup, and hot sauce- or not.

…Whatever you do, and however you make it, don’t forget those Barbecue Beans and coleslaw!

“To which it do you refer?” I inquired.

“IT!” said Luke.

Luke was referring to this.

This sandwich blew my mind. It was the perfect sandwich. I do not use the phrase ‘perfect sandwich’ lightly. It is a very serious appellation to [...]]]> This last week, my baby brother Luke told me admiringly that I had finally done it.

“To which it do you refer?” I inquired.

“IT!” said Luke.

Luke was referring to this.

This sandwich blew my mind. It was the perfect sandwich. I do not use the phrase ‘perfect sandwich’ lightly. It is a very serious appellation to give a sandwich*. This one earned it.

*Could I possibly use the word ‘sandwich’ any more? There just doesn’t seem to be any way around it. And so I’d like every single English and composition teacher reading this to take a muscle relaxant right now to help them get through the rest of this post without cringing themselves into spasms.

Let me tell you what makes this bad boy so very bad*. The sandwich is built of naan brushed with ghee, tandoori style grilled chicken, cucumber and yogurt salsa, crunchy pickled onion rings and candied jalapenos. Un-bloody-believably delicious. The Evil Genius declared it to be ‘A Second-to-Naanwich’.

*Bad in a good way. As in phat. Not fat. It’s totally fly. I should probably stop now. Fo shizzle.

Every single component of this sandwich was made from scratch. Okay, so I didn’t grow the lettuce greens, spices or the chicken, but shy of that, all homemade. And over the next few posts, I will give you the recipes to make each component needed to reproduce this amazing sandwich in your own kitchen.

Even though this sandwich alone is worth the work of making each of these building blocks, you’re not just canning, yogurt, bread, and grilling for one purpose. Each of the ingredients can be used for multiple recipes. This is a springboard recipe. Once you’ve mastered each component, the world is your oyster. Are you ready for the first part? Here we go!

We’re starting with Candied Jalapenos for a very good reason. After being made, they need to sit for at least two weeks before you crack open the jar to start eating them. And by need, I mean it’s strictly optional, but you’ll be glad that you did. The flavors need time to meld and marry.

Candied Jalapenos. Ah. There’s a story here. A couple months ago, my friend Katie casually mentioned eating a sandwich made with candied jalapenos. She was singing the praises of what she described as an addictive jar of goodies. Then she said the magic words, “I wish I could figure out how to make these at home.” By this point, you know me enough to know what affect that statement has on me, right?  I quizzed her on the texture, flavor, and appearance of the jalapeno rings. I begged for photographs. I had her send me a picture of the ingredient list on the label. I asked her to describe the flavor to the very best of her food blogging abilities. She was game. She provided all the information and even sent a link to a recipe that she thought looked like it would come close to the benchmark for her.

After carefully examining close to thirty recipes on candied jalapenos (who KNEW there were so many people candying jalapenos?) I called my local Cooperative Extension office to pick the brain of their home food preservation specialists. Since jalapenos are a low-acid food, some precautions need to be taken when canning them. You have two choices for safely canning peppers of any kind; you can pressure can them or you can acidify (i.e. add vinegar, lemon juice, etc…) the liquid in which you pack the peck of pickled peppers.

I opted for acidifying the pepper liquid because I wanted to maintain some of the texture of the peppers through the process.  Pressure canning these would turn them to flavorful mush.  The result was gobsmackingly, head-spinningly, brain-addlingly delicious.  Sweet, spicy and savory, candied jalapeno rings are way too easy to eat on just about everything.  I’ve stashed them in sandwiches, chopped them up on baked beans, tucked them into tacos, used the syrup to brush meat on the grill, perched a couple rings on top of a cream cheese laden cracker and all sorts of other evil things.

For such a simple thing to can, these pack tons of flavor.  You’re going to want to make as many of these as you possibly can simultaneously, because once that first jar is cracked open you’re not going to be able to stop eating them.  And I mean it.

Hey!  Don’t forget to come back over the next few days to get the other components to my Second-to-Naanwich.  You will love me.  That’s a promise.

For a printer-friendly, photo-free version of this recipe, click here!

Candied Jalapenos (Cowboy Candy)

Yield: About 9 half-pint jars of Candied Jalapenos plus additional jalapeno syrup.

Ingredients:

• 3 pounds fresh, firm, jalapeno peppers, washed
• 2 cups cider vinegar
• 6 cups white granulated sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon turmeric
• 1/2 teaspoon celery seed
• 3 teaspoons granulated garlic
• 1 teaspoon ground cayenne pepper

Wearing gloves, remove the stems from all of the jalapeno peppers.  The easiest way to do this is to slice a small disc off of the stem-end along with the stem.  Discard the stems.

Slice the peppers into uniform 1/8-1/4 inch rounds.  Set aside.

In a large pot, bring cider vinegar, white sugar, turmeric, celery seed, granulated garlic and cayenne pepper to a boil.  Reduce heat and simmer for 5 minutes.  Add the pepper slices and simmer for exactly 4 minutes.  Use a slotted spoon to transfer the peppers, loading into clean, sterile canning jars to within 1/4 inch of the upper rim of the jar.

Turn heat up under the pot with the syrup and bring to a full rolling boil.  Boil hard for 6 minutes.

Use a ladle to pour the boiling syrup into the jars over the jalapeno slices to within 1/4-inch of the rim.  Insert a cooking chopstick to the bottom of the jar two or three times to release any trapped pockets of air.  Adjust the level of the syrup if necessary.  Wipe the rims of the jars with a clean, damp paper towel and fix on new, two-piece lids to finger-tip tightness.

*If you have leftover syrup, and it is likely that you will, you may can it in half-pint or pint jars, too.  It’s wonderful brushed on meat on the grill or added to potato salad or, or, or…  In short, don’t toss it out!

Place jars in a canner, cover with water by 2-inches.  Bring the water to a full rolling boil.  When it reaches a full rolling boil, set the timer for 10 minutes for half-pints or 15 minutes for pints.  When timer goes off, use canning tongs to transfer the jars to a cooling rack.  Leave them to cool, undisturbed, for 24 hours.  When fully cooled, wipe them with a clean, damp washcloth then label.

Allow to mellow for at least two weeks, but preferably a month before eating. Or don’t.  I won’t tell!

I’m going to warn you right now.  The cake is made with a pound (A POUND, PEOPLE!) of butter, nine eggs, a pound of sugar and a pound of flour. Then the cake is sliced, spread with yet more butter and griddle fried. It’s addictive.  And it’s swimming in caramel.  And it’s topped with crème fraîche. [...]]]>

I’m going to warn you right now.  The cake is made with a pound (A POUND, PEOPLE!) of butter, nine eggs, a pound of sugar and a pound of flour. Then the cake is sliced, spread with yet more butter and griddle fried. It’s addictive.  And it’s swimming in caramel.  And it’s topped with crème fraîche. This is not low-fat or low-calorie.  At all. On any planet. But I don’t care because it left The Evil Genius speechless.  All he could do was make big, pleading eyes and gesture toward it with his fork.  Yes, this is the same husband who is on a diet.  Um.  Hang on a second. I’m not mean.  I didn’t do this to tempt him; we had company that we hadn’t seen in a long time and I wanted to give them a ‘wow’ dessert. He didn’t want them to eat alone. *

*”Because we all know there’s nothing sadder than someone who eats alone…” Right.  The man’s been on a diet for a month.  He wanted a piece of pound cake.  Trust me when I tell you that you can’t say ‘no’ when you smell a slab of this frying in butter on the griddle.  It’s not humanly possible.

He finished licking his plate (subtly, of course) and sidled back into the kitchen.  When I looked back at him he was halfway through another serving and groaning happily.  No shame.  No shame, I tell you.  (He’s awfully cute when he’s shameless…)

But you’ve been warned.  Now let me tell you why this is so absolutely addictive.

First, is the fine-textured, rich vanilla pound cake delicately scented with cardamom.  We’re about to move from painfully delicious territory to downright evil with a buttery, creamy caramel sauce that simmers away with paper thin slices of tart apples.  What we do next is nearly criminal.  One inch thick slices of the pound cake are buttered on one side and thrown on a hot griddle to fry.  When they’re golden brown with little flecks of caramelized bits, the cake is slid onto a plate, fried side up, to be topped with the buttery caramel and apple slices then crowned with crème fraîche.  Can you handle that? Because that is some serious dessert, my friends.

One final word of caution.  Make this when you have friends with large appetites dining with you.  Otherwise you just might find yourself eating it for breakfast.  Not that that’s a bad thing…

This is a multi-step recipe, but never fear.  I’m going to walk you through each little step needed to whip up this little beauty.  Each step is simple, but it’s important to hit each one!

For a photo-free, printer friendly version of this recipe minus my story about tempting my husband beyond his ability to resist, click here!

Vanilla Bean Cardamom Pound Cake with Apples in Caramel Sauce

Ingredients for the Pound Cake (adapted from Martha Stewart Living):

• 1 pound all-purpose flour (3-1/4 cups)
• 14 ounces (2 cups) granulated sugar
• 1 Tablespoon coarse salt
• 1 pound softened unsalted butter (4 sticks)
• 1 vanilla bean, split lengthwise
• 9 large, room-temperature eggs
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cardamom

Ingredients for the Apples in Caramel Sauce:

• 1/3 cup brown sugar, packed
• 1/3 cup granulated sugar
• 1/2 stick (4 Tablespoons) unsalted butter
• 1/3 cup heavy cream
• 4 medium sized tart apples, peeled and thinly sliced
• 1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

Also needed:

• additional softened butter for frying
• crème fraîche for garnishing

To Prepare the Cakes:

Preheat the oven to 325°F.

In a bowl, whisk together the flour and sugar.  Set aside.

Add the butter to the bowl of your stand mixer (or use a separate large mixing bowl with a hand mixer).  Use the butter wrappers to liberally grease two five-by-nine inch loaf pans.  Cream the butter and sugar on high speed until it is pale and fluffy.  This is going to take a while, but don’t skip this step.  It’ll take about 8 minutes.   Scrape down the bowl.

Use the dull edge of a knife to scrape the ‘caviar’ from the vanilla bean.  Add to the butter along with the cardamom.  Beat on high speed again for an additional minute.  Stop the mixer and scrape down the bowl again.  Add two eggs to the butter and sugar mixture and beat well.  Scrape down the bowl then add another two eggs and beat well.  Scrape down the bowl again and repeat with two more eggs.  After scraping down the bowl, add the final egg and beat well on high to make sure your mixture is even.

Reduce the mixer’s speed to low and add the flour in four batches, mixing well after each addition and scraping down the bowl before adding more.

Divide the batter as evenly as possible between the two loaf pans.  Tap the pans several times each to help work out air bubbles then smooth the top with a spatula.

Bake for about 60-65 minutes, or until a skewer or toothpick inserted in the center of the cake comes out clean.  Let the cakes cool in the pan for half an hour before turning out to cool completely on a wire rack.  While the cake is cooling, prepare the caramel sauce.

To Prepare the Apples in Caramel Sauce:

In a two-and-a-half quart saucepan, melt the butter together with the two sugars over low heat.  When the butter is completely melted, raise the heat to medium high and bring the mixture to a boil.  Boil hard for exactly four minutes.  Now carefully pour the heavy cream into the pan.  It will splutter and splash and boil madly, so do this carefully!  As soon as it is in, whisk until combined and add the thin slices of apple.  Lower heat to medium-low and partially cover the pan.  Let the mixture come back to a simmer.  Allow it to cook at a bare simmer for 3 minutes, or until the apple slices are tender but not mushy.  Remove from heat and stir in the vanilla extract.

To Plate your Magnificent Dessert:

Slice the pound cake into one-inch slices.  Butter one side of each slice.  Fry on a hot griddle until the underside of the cake is golden brown with some caramelized bits.  Transfer, fried side up, to a dessert plate.  Use a spoon to scoop apples and caramel sauce over the hot pound cake.  Top with a dollop of crème fraîche and serve while still warm.

Prepare to be adored.

This is the face of a monster.

Merciless.

This is a face that destroys on a whim.

Unyielding.

This is a face that -without pause- devastates the entire population…

Of cookie jars.

This is my cookie monster baby.

Allow me to illustrate.  The Evil Genius and I went to Houston before Christmas and the boys’ soon-to-be-nominated-for-sainthood Nana (a.k.a. My Mom) babysat the entire [...]]]>

This is the face of a monster.

Merciless.

This is a face that destroys on a whim.

Unyielding.

This is a face that -without pause- devastates the entire population…

Of cookie jars.

This is my cookie monster baby.

Allow me to illustrate.  The Evil Genius and I went to Houston before Christmas and the boys’ soon-to-be-nominated-for-sainthood Nana (a.k.a. My Mom) babysat the entire mini-horde.  My Mom is fun.  All kinds of fun.  Proof?  This is her just last month.

That’s right.  That’s MY mom, on the climbing wall of a playground, wearing a skirt and cotton shoes.  I told you she was all kinds of fun.

But I was telling you about the cookie monster.

Nana had plans for these boys.  They were going to sled, camp in the living room, hike through the snow, play board games, make glue and poster board collages, eat homemade pizza, go to her favorite coffee house,watch movies, make Christmas ornaments and decorate Christmas cookies while having a frosting war.* And they were going to accomplish this in three days.  Did I mention my mom is fun?

*A frosting war is a Christmas tradition started by my mom wherein she flings frosting at the children and they fling it back at her.  It involves a great amount of butter, laughter, sugar and paper towels.

The time came for the Christmas cookies.  According to reports, the boys all enthusiastically decorated a double batch of sugar cookies shaped like trees, bells, gingerbread men and whatnot.  When the job was done and the cookies were stacked to be nibbled after dinner, the whole company retired to the living room to fulfill the ‘watching movies’ portion of the programme.

Forty-five minutes into the movie, Liam asked, “Where’s Leif?”

Leif was discovered in the kitchen with a plate empty of cookies (save one), sticky fingers and a smile that stretched from the tip of one pink ear to the other.  And a fierce sugar buzz.  Leif killed the Christmas cookies.

Today’s cookie recipe is one that I watched my Grandma make hundreds of times at the camp where I lived as a child.* Hey.  My Grandma is fun, too.  (My Mom learned from the best, you know.) I ate my way through more of these cookies than I could ever count as a kid and I’m still in love with them.

*Lake Louise United Methodist Camp.  Shout out to Boyne Falls, Michigan!

I’m not sure why these were called Amish Cookies but I have a guess.  They make abundant use of humble ingredients to turn out a cookie that manages to be  delicately caramel flavored, crisp on the outside, chewy on the inside and surprisingly sturdy all at the same time..  These cookies don’t fall apart when you dunk them in a tall glass of cold milk.  And they hold together beautifully when crammed into my apron pockets for stolen bites when the kids aren’t looking.  I do believe these are the perfect cookies.

The recipe, as written by my Grandma, suggests chocolate chips, raisins, nuts, chopped dates, coconut and other goodies as stir-ins.  Around these parts, I split the cookie dough into two bowls and stir raisins into one half and chocolate chips into the other.  This makes everyone happy; including the cookie monster.

And if I find that I’ve let down my guard and left the room before securing the cookies I don’t panic.  If my little monster eats his way through a cooling rack of these, at least I’ll have snuck some fruit and oats into him.

For a printer-friendly, photo-free, just-the-facts version of this recipe, click here!

Amish Cookies

Adapted from my Grandma Shaffer’s Lake Louise Amish Cookies recipe.

Ingredients:

• 3/4 cup softened butter (6 ounces)
• 3/4 cup coconut oil or shortening (6 ounces)
• 2 cups granulated sugar (14 ounces by weight)
• 1 large egg
• 1/3 cup molasses (3 1/2 ounces)
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 3- 1/2 cups all purpose flour (15 ounces by weight)
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
• 1 Tablespoon baking soda (not a misprint!)
• 1 Tablespoon baking powder (also not a misprint!)
• 3 cups old-fashioned rolled oats
• 1/2 cup buttermilk (Don’t forget, you can make your own!)
• Optional: 1 -1/2 cups of any of the following ingredients: chocolate chips, nuts, raisins, coconut, chopped dates, dried cherries, or chocolate chunks.

Preheat oven to  350°F.

In the bowl of a stand mixer or in a large mixing bowl with a hand mixer, cream together the butter, and coconut oil or shortening on low speed until they the sugar starts combining with the fat.  Turn the mixer to medium high speed and whip until the mixture is fluffy and the sugar is completely distributed.

Add the egg, molasses and vanilla extract to the butter and beat on medium speed until even.

In a separate bowl, use a whisk to combine the flour, salt, cinnamon, baking soda and powder, and the rolled oats.  Add this to the butter mixture along with the buttermilk and beat until thoroughly combined.  Stir in the optional goodies.

On a greased or parchment lined cookie sheet, drop generously rounded tablespoons of the cookie dough three inches apart. Form the cookie dough into balls.

Use a flat bottomed drinking glass dipped in sugar to gently flatten the cookie dough.

Bake for 10 minutes, or until the bottoms and edges of the cookies are lightly browned and the cookies are set. Allow cookies to rest on the cookie sheets for one minute before transferring to a cooling rack.  Store cooled cookies in an airtight container at room temperature.

…And for the love of all that’s holy, don’t leave this little guy in the room alone with a batch of these cookies…

These muffins won’t win any beauty contests.  They’re not the prettiest muffins on the block.  They have a muffin face only a mother could love.  But man-oh- man, they’re delicious.  Let me break it down for you…

Looks tasty, doesn’t it?  It’s crisp around the edges with the perfect balance of saltiness and creaminess in the center.  It’s nourishing.  It’s delicious.  It fills you up.  It only takes five minutes to make from start to finish. But you know what else dings my chimes about this dish? It costs $3.42 for four large [...]]]>

Looks tasty, doesn’t it?  It’s crisp around the edges with the perfect balance of saltiness and creaminess in the center.  It’s nourishing.  It’s delicious.  It fills you up.  It only takes five minutes to make from start to finish. But you know what else dings my chimes about this dish? It costs $3.42 for four large servings.  And yes, that includes garnish.

And no, I’m not joking.

I sat down today prepared to write a little ‘how-to’ on saving money in the kitchen with a family favorite recipe thrown in to boot.  The keyword here was ‘little’.  An hour into writing, I realized there was no way to condense what is a way of life into one itty-bitty post with a recipe.  I have enough material to fill four posts and I will get to every bit of it.  I want you to come back for all of this.  Here’s the deal.  I know saving money in the kitchen isn’t exactly the sexiest topic.  I get it.  So I have a little incentive to offer.  But first, a question.

How much do you spend on food each month?  And how many people are you feeding?  You don’t have to tell me unless you feel so inclined, but just consider it for a moment.  According to the USDA’s Cost of Food reports (published monthly), my family of seven should be spending $804.40* per month on our food.

*This is calculated according to the ‘Thrifty’ food plan numbers given on the chart.  If I were to use the ‘Low’ food plan we would be expected to spend in excess of $1,067.  This trend continues on up through the ‘Moderate’ and ‘Liberal’ plans.

Here is my incentive.  I’m going to tell you what I spend every month on groceries.  I’m also going to tell you what another blogger buddy of mine, my dear friend Krysta a.k.a. Evil Chef Mom,  pays monthly to feed her family of six. Just one other question, though, before divulging our food budgets.  Would you agree, from all appearances here at Foodie With Family and over at Evil Chef Mom that our families eat pretty well?  You might even say a wee bit on the fancy-pants side occasionally?  I think that’s fairly safe to say, right?

I spend $500 a month.  I feed seven people and whatever friends or family happen to be hanging around at meal time out of that.

Krysta spends between $650 and $700 a month.  She’s feeding three, count ‘em, THREE teenagers, a pre-teen, a host of kids’ friends (also teenagers), and any family or friends who might be present at meal time.

We both make food good enough to share.

That puts me in at more than $300 under what the government believes is the least amount of money a family my size would reasonably spend per month in food.

Lest you should get the wrong idea let me tell you something important.  Neither of us coupon shops.  Neither of us obsessively watches sales.   None of us -ourselves, our kids or our husbands- feel deprived of the food we want or crave.  We are food lovers.

It’s really simple.  Really.  I wouldn’t lie to you!

Starting tomorrow we’ll go through a series of posts chock full of tips, tricks, and methods that can potentially help you save beaucoup bucks in the kitchen without sacrificing flavor or slaving away in the kitchen.  Unless, of course, you like slaving away in the kitchen.  The point is that it’s your choice.

Let me break down the food cost from today’s recipe:

• 2 cups of uncooked rice from a 25 pound bag.  The bag was $16.  There were 62.5 cups of rice in the bag. That translates to $0.51 for this recipe.
• 6 eggs from a dozen at a cost of $1.50 per dozen (from our own chickens).  The cost for the eggs was $0.75.
• 1 cup of shredded cheese from a 3 cup bag that cost $2.79.  The cost of the cheese for this recipe was $0.93.
• 1 Tablespoon of hot sauce from a bottle containing twenty tablespoons.   The bottle cost $2.99.  The hot sauce used in this recipe cost $0.15.
• 1 teaspoon of salt from a one pound box that cost $2.99.  The one pound box contained 283 teaspoons.  That puts the cost of the salt in this recipe at a fraction of a cent over $0.01.
• 2 Tablespoons of canola oil from a $1.00 jar that contained sixty tablespoons.  The cost of the oil is $0.03.
• 8 Tablespoons of salsa from a jar containing twenty two tablespoons.  This is the big splurge in our recipe.  Since the jar cost $2.79, the total cost of the salsa for the dish was a whopping $1.04.
• That makes the grand total for the whole recipe a bank-book friendly $3.42.  If you skipped the salsa you’d clock in at $2.38 for the whole entree.

This is great-tasting food, too.  You can make a whole batch of them, store them in an airtight container in the refrigerator, and take a couple a day to work or school for lunch.  They reheat beautifully.  If you  need a little something extra, throw a handful of salad alongside.  Bang.  A complete meal.

There are more options.  You can mix in some leftover cooked meat or vegetables.  Wrapped in a piece of foil or a paper towel it’s a meal you can take on the road with you. No matter how you slice it, it’s going to be cheaper and more filling for the money than even the dollar menu.

Frugal does not have to look or taste like sacrifice.

Hang on.  There’s more to it.  It’s good for you.  It’s great for you.  The egg provides lean protein.  The rice provides a healthy carbohydrate.  The canola oil is non-hydrogenated. The salt is negligible.  On it’s own, it’s healthy.  If, however,  you compare it to fast-food or pre-packaged, processed food you’re going to come out leaps and bounds and miles ahead nutritionally.

How about it?  Are you interested?  Try the Savoury Rice and Egg Pancakes and then come back tomorrow.  This is going to be fun! I promise!

For a photo-free, printer-friendly version of this recipe, click here!

Savoury Rice and Egg Pancakes

Ingredients:

• 4 cups chilled leftover cooked rice
• 6 large eggs
• 1 cup shredded cheese, whatever type you have on hand
• 1 Tablespoon hot sauce
• 1 teaspoon Kosher salt
• 2 Tablespoons Canola oil (or non-stick cooking spray)
• 8 Tablespoons salsa
• optional: thinly sliced green onion tops

Break up the cold rice in a mixing bowl (or in a resealable plastic bag) with your hands so that no chunks remain.

Crack eggs into the rice, add shredded cheese, hot sauce and Kosher salt.  Mix thoroughly.

If your mixture is too thick or dry, you can crack another egg into it.  Eggs vary in size, so this may happen occasionally.  So, gee whiz, add another $0.10 to the total if you need to do it.

Add just enough oil to a non-stick skillet to lightly coat the pan.  Place pan over medium high heat.  When the pan is hot scoop a scant quarter cup into the pan.  Use the bottom of the scoop to gently pat the rice mixture out to a thinner patty shape.  The mixture will not spread on its own.

Don’t crowd the pan.  This 12″ nonstick pan can comfortably fit four pancakes at a time.

Cook for about two minutes per side, or until deep golden brown on each side.

Transfer to a waiting plate and repeat with the remaining rice and oil until it is gone. Serve with salsa.  You can plate it up all perty-like if you want.  And I want.